final show

On Tuesday 21 we perform or final show for the college students and teacher, witch was a devised piece that was based on various stories that teenagers, my age or going threw on a daily-bases.

we perform for an audience of 50 people.

while wait for or audience to take their seat that's when the whole group started to panic, we all was seating back stage hearing the audience coming in, i remember thinking in my head this it, this is the time to prove to miss Jackie (the director) that you could take her feet back and have an outstanding performance.

and this is because during our tech run i was finding it hard to find my emotion and connecting with the character i had to play, and that was really bothering me because i really wanted to do good i mean i have a friend suffering from what my character was  about witch was depression and i just couldn't find my inner connection.

but then for the show. whilst waiting back stage i just focus on what scared me and hurt me the most about seeing her (my friend) in that condition and i found my emotion and finally connecting with my character and give it my all and my best, and i find it was good i really enjoyed myself and the play, i mean the story and message we was trying to get out was powerful i really enjoyed it.  

research evidence for my piece.

the last scene is a poem "called When all is lost".

i couldn't get it copie so this is the link to it.

http://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/docs/Whenallislost.swf

this poem was partied individually between the group.

all these research help us because they are real stories that people shared with the world their own personal story and for them to be so open and honest with stories that are so dark and hard to even say is amazing am going to try my best and share it to the audience properly and pass the message to show how powerful depression and mental health is.

research evidence for my piece

the first scene it base of the script called The Day THE Music Died 

                                                     The Day the Music Died

 ‘No! They make my head fuzzy.’   A savage glare. ‘You’re trying to turn me into a dumb animal!’ I eventually get her to swallow the tablets.   She resents me bitterly: but I’m trying to keep her alive. The latest bouts of self‐mutilation and suicidal talk caused the psychiatrist to change my daughter’s medication. She snarls that these pills dull her mind, she can no longer feel the music in her head. For Jacinta, a talented seventeen‐year‐old, to be unable to compose and perform her own music is living death. I leave her bedroom door open. Fifteen minutes later, I hear a child’s voice crying, ‘Mummy’. She is sobbing bitterly but won’t let me touch her. ‘Mummy, please let me die, please.’ I shudder but manage to sound soothing. ‘You’ll feel better in a few weeks, honey. Just hang in there.’ ‘But I wanted to die before and now the music’s gone as well.’ ‘Give the tablets time to work. The doctor said you should feel better in about six weeks.’ ‘But will my music come back?’ This child who oscillates between three and thirty is too bright to be fooled by baseless promises. ‘I don’t know, honey, but you won’t have to stay on these tablets forever. Your depression and anxiety were getting worse, probably because the exams are coming. Just put up with it until they’re over … maybe you can cut back then.’ I had thought long and hard about withdrawing her from school, but she’s an overachiever; that would seem the ultimate failure to her. I decide that it would only increase the chance of suicide. ‘What if I can’t?’ A desperate child’s anguished cry. ‘I want to die!’ ‘More counselling could help. Perhaps you’d manage on milder tablets then.’ ‘Mrs P! She’s fuddy‐duddy, just like you.’ I know the woman isn’t suitable for my hip daughter but our choices are limited. I’m on a pension since my own breakdown several years ago, and looking for an independent psychologist who would suit Jacinta is out of the question financially.


the word's highlighted in red is what i will be using in the first scene.
the word's highlighted in yellow is what natalia will be using in the first scene.

the second  scene is base of the script called And Then My Tears Subsided.... 

                                                 And Then My Tears Subsided...

“This morning I will get out of bed. This morning I will go to school. Today I will finish my maths test. I will hand in my English project and during the lunch break I will socialise with my friends. I will laugh, joke and talk with my friends. I will tell witty stories about my weekend and before I know it the school day will be over and no one will know how I am feeling on the inside. Then when I get home I can go back to bed and not have to pretend for anyone anymore.” The words above are from a journal entry I wrote on April 20, 2000. At the time I was 14 years old, in Year 9 at High School. I can remember back to the morning of this journal entry. I barely managed to haul myself out of bed and go to school and when I arrived I could not contain my tears enough to enter the classroom. I walked back out through the front gate less than half an hour after I had walked in. Experiencing clinical depression throughout my adolescence was at times quite gruelling. I think back to my high school years and I can almost feel the memories of the confusion and the frustration of my dark times. The times of not being able to stop crying for days. The moments I felt pain so intensely I thought it would never subside. My appetite fluctuations, the anxiety and the irritability. The almost permanent fatigue which I felt would never lift because I could rarely sleep through the night. I felt empty and numb and alone. I went through phases of indecisiveness, which annoyed my friends almost as much as it annoyed me. I felt paranoid and guilty and my mood would change in what felt like only seconds. Then there were the feelings that made me believe suicide would solve all my problems. When I remember back to this time in my life sometimes I wonder how I made it through, how I am still here today. Then, at other times I don't have to think for very long about what helped me and why I am still here. There were many different people and many different things which helped me through these years. For a long time I did not talk to anyone about how I was feeling. I was incredibly confused and did not know that other people felt much the same way as I did. I thought something was wrong with me and I felt like I should make myself 'normal' again. This was probably the worst thing I tried to do. I was 13 years old, I had never heard validation of any mental illness, I only knew that 'crazy people' were locked away. Around this time the internet was just becoming available for public use. I was able to connect at school sometimes and this was where I could anonymously research what was 'wrong' with me. Through research on the internet and books I would read in the corners of public libraries, I learned that depression was a real illness, affecting many more people than just me. This brought me a huge amount of comfort – just as reading stories of others living with depression did. It was around this time I felt empowered enough to try and change how I was feeling. I researched every alternative therapy to that of medication

evaluation of thursday june 4

what is missing from the peace as a whole.

i think everybody need more connection with the story line and their personal character. because if we don't connect with the piece and the story line then the audience won't connect either .and if we connect it will be more develop.

evolution of thursday's rehearsal, 14 june

 what is missing from my scene: 

come up with an idea to improve that moment.

the moment between the mother and daughter is not emotionally developed  we have been working on it with my group and came up with some good ideas to develop it, by adding when the mother is giving her daughter her pilles the daughter will refuse to take it but the mom won't stop until she take it so the daughter look her dead in the eyes and take them one by one.

another scene me and mariana have to get in an argument about why i never come to meet her, we made it more clear by adding more emotion and i have to react to her anger because am not mentally stable because of what happened the night before and she don't know what am going thru and home so she have a go at me and i have to cry and show emoting.

depression

my character has depression, and this is some information about depression.



                            Depression

Depression is a common mental disorder that causes people to experience depressed mood, loss of interest or pleasure, feelings of guilt or low self-worth, disturbed sleep or appetite, low energy, and poor concentration.

Depression is different from feeling down or sad. Unhappiness is something which everyone feels at one time or another, usually due to a particular cause. A person experiencing depression will experience intense emotions of anxiety, hopelessness, negativity and helplessness, and the feelings stay with them instead of going away.

Depression can happen to anyone. Many successful and famous people who seem to have everything going for them battle with this problem. Depression also affects people of every age.

Half of the people who have depression will only experience it once but for the other half it will happen again. The length of time that it takes to recover ranges from around six months to a year or more.

Living with depression is difficult for those who suffer from it and for their family, friends, and colleagues. It can be difficult to know if you are depressed and what you can do about it.

photos about depression

Our First Ever Idea

we are going to base or scene on Shequanda story not the real story but a version of it. we are going to start with a monologue and end with a monologue.

it's going to start in a school Sheqaunda gets a panic attack some of us is going to take it serious and some of us is going to ignore it Shequanda will be miss for a couple of weeks we realize and call but know answer. 

1st monologue: Marianna

Last monologue: Shequanda

hospital scene three nurse two mental health me and Marianna try's to help Shequanda doesn't listing have to call natalia to her calm her down two nurse go help Annisha her eat.

Evaluation

WHAT WENT WELL TODAY WAS THAT WE STARTED SCENE TWO, AND CAME UP WITH IDEAS ASK A GROUP INCLUDING MISS JACKIE AND MISS DONNIA AND TRY PUT THEM TOGETHER AND MAKE IT WORK.

EXAMPLE: SCENE TWO IS ABOUT ME NARRATING A STORY ABOUT ME BEING HAPPY WHEN AM WITH MY FRIENDS BUT WHEN AM ALONE I CUT MYSELF.  

WHAT DIDN'T WENT WELL WAS THAT WE DIDN'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO. MOREOVER I TOLD MISS JACKIE AND THINGS DIDN'T GO WELL.

 EXAMPLE: IT HAD TEARS AT THE END AND WE COULDN'T CONTINUE BECAUSE 
WE WAS MAKING SURE OUR CLASS MATE WAS WELL ENOUGH TO CONTINUE THE SCENE.

I HAVE LEANED TO COME UP WITH MY OWN IDEAS, NOT TO DEPEND ON MY TEACHER TO DO EVERYTHING.LEARN TO TAKE CRITICS AND MOVE ON FROM IT

TARGET: GET UP AND MOTIVATE THE GROUP TO WORK, REALISE IF AM NOT WORKING HARD ENOUGH, GIVE MUCH MORE IDEAS MAKE SURE WE FINISH THE SCENES AS A GROUP.

                                                      COLLABORATE 

 1. ACCEPT OTHER PEOPLE IDEAS.
2. WORK AS A GROUP.
3.LISTEN CAREFULLY.
4.GIVE LOTS OF DIFFERENT IDEAS.
5.DON'T GIVE UP
6.WORK PHYSICALLY. 

first day pf my group planing for our final show

we are going to do a peace on mental illness/depression.

different type of mental health.

Types of Mental Illness

There are many different conditions that are recognized as mental illnesses. The more common types include:

• Anxiety disorders: People with anxiety disorders respond to certain objects or situations with fear and dread, as well as with physical signs of anxiety or panic, such as a rapid heartbeat and sweating. An anxiety disorder is diagnosed if the person's response is not appropriate for the situation, if the person cannot control the response, or if the anxiety interferes with normal functioning. Anxiety disorders include generalized anxiety disorder, panic disorder, social anxiety disorder, and specific phobias.
• Mood disorders: These disorders, also called affective disorders, involve persistent feelings of sadness or periods of feeling overly happy, or fluctuations from extreme happiness to extreme sadness. The most common mood disorders are depression, bipolar disorder, and cyclothymic disorder.
• Psychotic disorders: Psychotic disorders involve distorted awareness and thinking. Two of the most common symptoms of psychotic disorders are hallucinations -- the experience of images or sounds that are not real, such as hearing voices -- and delusions, which are false fixed beliefs that the ill person accepts as true, despite evidence to the contrary. Schizophrenia is an example of a psychotic disorder.
• Eating disorders: Eating disorders involve extreme emotions, attitudes, and behaviour involving weight and food. Anorexia nerve, bulimia nervosa, and binge eating disorder are the most common eating disorders.
• Impulse control and addiction disorders: People with impulse control disorders are unable to resist urges, or impulses, to perform acts that could be harmful to themselves or others. Pyromania (starting fires), kleptomania (stealing), and compulsive gambling are examples of impulse control disorders. Alcohol and drug are common objects of addictions. Often, people with these disorders become so involved with the objects of their addiction that they begin to ignore responsibilities and relationships.
• Personality disorders: People with personality disorders have extreme and inflexible personality traits that are distressing to the person and/or cause problems in work, school, or social relationships. In addition, the person's patterns of thinking and behaviour significantly differ from the expectations of society and are so rigid that they interfere with the person's normal functioning. Examples include antisocial personality disorder, obsessive-compulsive personality disorder, and paranoid personality disorder.
• Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD): People with OCD are plagued by constant thoughts or fears that cause them to perform certain rituals or routines. The disturbing thoughts are called obsessions, and the rituals are called compulsions. An example is a person with an unreasonable fear of germs who constantly washes his or her hands.
• Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD): PTSD is a condition that can develop following a traumatic and/or terrifying event, such as a sexual or physical assault, the unexpected death of a loved one, or a natural disaster. People with PTSD often have lasting and frightening thoughts and memories of the event, and tend to be emotionally numb.

                                                                EVALUATION

12/05/2016

 WHAT WENT WELL: IN TODAY'S LESSON WE HAD TO COME UP WITH OR FIRST SCENE AND I THOUGHT WE WORK VERY WELL WE GOT THE GIVE OR IDEAS AND COME UP WITH A VERY GOOD SCENE THAT EVERYONE FELT COMFORTABLE DOING, I REALLY SAW THE CHANGE IN THE GROUP WE BECAME MORE COMFORTABLE WITH EACH OTHER AND GIVING OR LIL OPINION.

WHAT DIDN'T GO WILL: MISS JACKIE THOUGHT THAT IT WAS TO DRAMATIC AND THAT WE SHOULD DO SOMETHING MORE GENTLE AND SERIOUS AND NOT EVER DRAMATIC. SO THAT THE AUDIENCE COULD FEEL AND SEE HOW SERIOUS MENTAL ILLNESS COULD ME.

WHAT COULD WE IMPROVE: GROW UP TAKE THE FEETBACK LIKE A PROFESSIONAL ACTOR AND DO OR BEST AND COME UP WITH THE BEST SCENES EVER. MAKE IT LOOK OUT OF THE BOX.

3 TARGET: BE MORE BRAVE AND NOT AFRAID TO GIVE MY OPINION
                    TAKE IT REALLY SERIOUS
                    DO MORE RESEARCH ON MENTAL HEALTH ILLNESS.

WHAT I LEARN ABOUT MYSELF TODAY IS THAT I AM VERY WORRIED ABOUT  HURTING OR BRINGING BACK UP MEMORIES THAT ONE OF MY FRIEND EXPERIENCE CAUSE I DON'T WANT HER TO FELL DOWN.



 

MY STRENGHT

       -LISTEN WELL IN A GROUP
       -GOOD COMMUNICATION
       -COMING UP WITH IDEAS.
       -GOOD IMAGINATION
       -VERY ENERGETIC
       -GOOD AT BEING VERY SERIOUS
       -GETTING INTO CHARACTER

ENERGETIC: I PLAN TO ALWAYS BE READY TO START SOMETHING NEW
                     I WILL  ALWAYS BE PUSHING SOMEONE TO GET UP
                       I'M ALWAYS LOUD AND HAPPY
                        I LOVE DRAMATIC SCENES,BEING CREATIVE.
     
 

                                                      the most stressful weeks ever

miss jackie was not their for a couple of weeks and the class was horrible.we did not have a replacement teacher until a week after, and we did get one nobody was quiet focus at all it was really hard to focus and be serious,i think it was because the class got use to not having lesson that we start to forgetting how serious it was to be focus.

target: step up my game and help the replacement teacher get the class attention, realise when am not being focus.

how i have to improve.
by being more faithful to my characters
And try to be more punctual
take threesecond and listing before answering back my teacher.

About the group

good: practice

- give feedback
- participate
- supportive
- honest
- emotional focus

unprofessional: practice

- unfocused: when someone makes a joke and its difficult to refocus.
- punctuality
- lack of respect
- do not participate
- talking over others

 what are my challenges?
- staying focus in lesson and getting distracted by others in the class pay more attention to MS  Jackie  learn to accept my class mate feetback.

in lesson we been talking about progressing onto level three.

and how to use the 3 (w)  worlds  when you learning your script work

well we are getting scripts for are now play  and the name off the play's "Road"

"Road" 

Road is the first play written by Jim Cartwright, and was first produced in 1986.
The play explores the lives of the people in a deprived, working class area of Lancashire during the government of Margaret Thatcher, a time of high unemployment in the north of England. Despite its explicit nature, it was considered extremely effective in portraying the desperation of people's lives at this time, as well as containing a great deal of humour. The play won a number of awards and was voted the 36th best play of the 20th century in a poll by the Royal National Theatre. Set on a road on a busy night, the audience delve into the houses on the street and the characters lives.
The play is often performed on a promenade, allowing the audience to follow the narrator (Scullery) along the road and visit different sets and the different homes of the characters. The play was initially performed at the Royal Court Theatre "Upstairs", in 1986 with Edward Tudor-Pole as Scullery, moving "Downstairs" in 1987 with Ian Dury as the narrator.
It was later made for television by renowned director Alan Clarke and starred many young actors who later became well-known including Jane Horrocks, David Thewlis, Moya Brady and Lesley Sharp.
Road was produced in New York by Lincoln Center Theater at La MaMa Etc. in 1988, with a cast including Joan Cusack and Kevin Bacon.

so the show is next week am so excited to perform it


it looks good although it had a lot of misunderstanding  putting it together

so today jackie put me and jazz to do a new scene together and i think it whe n well we had to try make it work so we come up with and ideas for or characters to connect so we choose that we both have problem with or parents and it work so am going to see how it goes tomorrow.

try fit it in somewhere!

well today we cut out some scenes because they was not working so happy we are not doing to shabooya bit anymore it was way to long so happy with what jackie change it with thanks jackie


target work on the now scene that we learn today!

we had some hard day because we was not focused i know some of us give jackie a hard time it was really frustrating for her to get or attention we really got to work on that

hopefully we get a better run tomorrow .!!!

Well we started rehearsing for the big show and we had to choose a character to be, obviously i choose to be a cheerleader!! because their energy is very high and their bitchy and that not who i am so i just thought i would go for a character thats way out my comfort zone and i thought being a cheerleader is perfect.


my character was base off a cheerleader from Bring It On All Or Nothing her name is kirresha.

this is one of her quote's i have to use in the play  
- My name Kirresha. Get out my face. 'Cause when I shake it, it's like an earthquake. 
-Don't hate cause he on me. 
-Damn, Tyson, that's what your nasty ass gets.





my target for this week is to learn my lines by heart and make sure i know and have a lot of energy 

class targete stay focused don't lose concentration.